It was 2014.
I was at TestBash 3.0. No, it wasn't about Crypto you jokers! It was the third TestBash event. The year before, they had come up with an idea for 99-second talks. I did one then, and I wanted to do so again this time. Earlier that week I met Emma Keaveny and we were sat together watching one of the talks. I was racking my brain trying to think of a topic but nothing. Nada. Nowt.
During one of the talks*, lightning struck!
Emma the muse!
Eureka!
Emma leaned over and made a comment** about a point the speaker had just made and BOOM! I had my idea! What are all the weird and wonderful things people think and say about testing? I immediately started scribbling them down.
And without further ado, here they are!***
37 Myths about software testing
Anyone can do testing!
Nobody would ever do that!
Why didn't you find that bug?
Test cases == Testing
Programmers cannot test
Testers should program
Programming is the only technical skill worth learning
Testers should not share their test ideas
The only way to control testing is to count things (bugs, test cases, etc)
Performance testing must be done "at the end"
ISEB/ISTQB will solve all your problems
ISEB/ISTQB is the root of all evil
"How long will it take to test this?" is the question they want answering
I won't speak to anyone here (e.g. TestBash) because I have nothing interesting to say
There is no value in checking
There is only value in checking
Testing == QA
Testing adds no value
"Quality is value to some person" but you're not that person
Testing == Checking
Requirements == Requirements document
Test plan == Test plan document
Agile testing is all about "automated testing"
Testers cannot contribute to hackathons
Programmers shouldn't test
Testers add no value
Project management adds no value
Automated checking solves all your problems
Automated checking solves no problems
Automated checking is free
BDD == Testing
Regression testing theatre mitigates risk
Spinning cats == possessed cats****
100% automation of testing is possible
Zero defects are possible
Best practises will save you
Testers just click buttons
Worst memory ever...
* I cannot remember for the life of me who's talk this was 🤦🏾♂️
** Er... I cannot remember what on earth Emma said that triggered my flash of inspiration either 🤦🏾♂️
*** I only managed to get through the first 30 before the 99-seconds were up 😅
**** You kinda had to be there 🐈⬛ 😵💫