So I could stop pretending to be someone else

When I was 28, a coach gave me an unforgettable piece of advice.

I was just starting to get interested in personal growth and had been running myself ragged trying to figure out how to get people to like me more. I had always gotten strong reactions from people; they loved me or hated me. And I would obsess over the ones who were not my fans.

Until one day, a coach said to me:

"You're thinking about this all wrong."

That day, my whole life changed.

She explained that I needed to stop thinking about my likability and instead focus on my magnetism. Through my natural energy, I attract some people and I repel others. That's just how magnets work.

I had to make a choice.

If I tried to minimize the strength by which I turned some people off, I would also minimize the strength by which I drew others in. Who mattered to me more? Those who loved me for me or those turned off by my energy?

My energy is my power.

With that simple mindset shift, I stopped limiting myself to appease my detractors. I can't please them anyway, so why bother? Better to focus on those who love me for me.

I have forgotten about my likability and instead focus on my magnetism, my power.