If you feel stuck in your personal growth,

bottlenecked by your relationships,

and realizing you fear change,

You may be holding a scarcity mindset with a leaning towards codependency.

The good news?

If you're reading this you are likely on the path to an abundance mindset. 🧵

In Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs Safety is before love and belonging.

Love/belonging is: Family, friendship, and sexual intimacy.

Safety is: Health, property, employment, resources, morality, and family.

If you haven't secured yourself in safety you may be overlapping safety and love/belonging. What this can result in is relational imbalance. You may place all of your safety needs in your relationship.

Resulting in codependence.

If the relationship is your entire source of security you will do everything you can to protect it. Including avoiding risks - and the growth that comes with taking risks. This creates a narrow worldview and limits possibilities - and each persons potential.

The way to improve?

Begin setting boundaries by pursuing "selfish" interests. Like a new skill, or hobby that has always been interesting. Then observe the friction this pursuit causes in the relationship.

Use the friction as a guide.

Reflect on the pain points that arise with these pursuits.

Ask yourself:

• What fears are behind these reactions?

• Do I/we feel anxious or threatened?

• What is the source of the emotion?
  
  

  Now, you have begun to untangle your personal safety needs from your relational needs. Continue this action/reflection process and monitor your results (journal). Look back in 1 month and check your progress.
  
  You'll have come farther than you think.