My horse is in love with another human.

He whinnies and runs towards her when she arrives at his paddock. He scratches her when she brushes him. He follows her through the scariest places.

He rarely behaves like that with me.

When I found out about this love story I inevitably had to ask myself the question every lover asks themselves when they are replaced:

What does she have that I don't?

And the answers to this question teach me a little bit about friendship:

Every time she works with him she tries to figure out what he needs that day and give that to him first before she asks him to do stuff she wants.

She always assumes good intentions. She told me "I know he would never turn against me so I stay relaxed even when things get a little heated."

Her behavior is consistent, predictable and calm. She's the rock he can rely on when he gets scared.

They started from a clean slate. The two of us have been together for more than eight years and as in every long-term relationship there have been fights, crises and disappointments. Sometimes the memories of such unpleasant events can make it hard to see the things that are truly great in the other person (or pony, in this case). Even more important to look at them with fresh eyes, and focus on the lovable quirks and particularity that made you wanna be their friend in the first place.

This is about a relationship between a human and a beloved pet. But the lessons I'm learning teach me something about my relationships with the people around me, too.