How well do you manage strong emotions like grief, anger, or fear?

If you seem to handle them well, you probably have learned effective self-soothing methods from your parents. But if those feelings are a problem for you, you may not have any healthy ways of coping because you never learned them. It's never too late, though.

It's an easy process to discover what soothing methods work for you.

If you think about it, you probably already know of a few.

Think back to when you were a child. Do you remember anything then that helped you feel calmer or comforted? I can remember my mom stroking my forehead when I was sick, which made me feel loved.

The critical thing to remember is to make sure you use healthy coping skills, not using something like food or alcohol to mask your feelings.

Here are some ideas:

• Crying

• Exercise

• Journaling

• Being outside

• Aromatherapy

• A warm shower or bath

• Snuggle time with a pet

Sometimes these ideas won't work; you can decide if you want to try again or cross that one off.

I find that soft, gentle activities work with sad feelings, while anger requires something more forceful like exercise or cleaning.

You can also combine more than one soothing technique. And just because they are called soothing doesn't mean you can't beat on a pillow with your fists and cry if you want to. It's all about letting you express your feelings and get them out.

Don't try and bury your feelings; work through them and get them out.