Everyone can enjoy a 1 hour cup of coffee or liquid with their spouse each day.

The problem?

Most people don't have a clue how to create the margin in their life to relax and enjoy that time.

Here are 5 steps that might help you get started and stick to your 1hr date.

Step 1: Say No

Our world shoves everything at you to stuff you so full you don't have time for what matters most.

If you say "yes" to every opportunity, ever church event, every party invite, every new streaming series, or to doom scrolling on Facebook, Twitter, Tiktok or even LinkedIn... you are doomed to be too busy.

Make your default answer "No" to everything outside of your family and core amount of work that pays the bills.

Step 2: Put It On Your Calendar

For a year every morning 9-10am was blocked off as "Coffee Hour With Sandi." (not to mention another one blocked off in the afternoon)

Even though we homeschool our kids, own business, live on a sailboat, and still have to do all the thousand other things that those responsibilities include, we were able to spend that hour 95%+ of the time. The key was making it a priority BEFORE the week, BEFORE the day even got started. It was my number 1 priority.

You prioritize what you value, even if you can't do 1hr to start, put 30 minutes and work up to the 1hr.

Step 3: Fight the Invaders!

The moment the coffee is poured all hell may be unleashed.

The phone will ring, kids will scream, doorbells will ring, that client will email wanting a call at the same time, but you say "No" to giving up and getting distracted. Of course you handle the kids crying, but you come BACK and sit down to finish the hour out. Soon it'll just be a natural part of life and it gets easier.

You get better at prepping your fortress against invasion.

Step 4: Have Good Ingredients (Coffee/Wine/Etc.)

A way to help you double down on executing that time is to actually have good ingredients.

If you know you have Death Wish Pumpkin Spice coffee waiting for you, plus your spouse. You'll be really motivated to sit your butt in the seat and enjoy that time. Your body, mind, and heart will begin to look forward to that time so you've got everything working for you.

This requires planning ahead and keeping stocked on the ingredients that help make the hour happen.

Step 5: Enjoy the Time

If you choose to make this the best part of your day, it will be.

Making sure you are present, (which is hard at first!) enjoying the time with your spouse, and not wishing you were working or doing something else is vital to helping this be a time of connection. Sit close to each other, hold hands, arms around, whatever way you connect when you want to be close. This will give your body and mind feel good feelings that'll help make this time even more enjoyable.

Time + great coffee + amazing spouse + physical touch = a good morning for me.