Before the pandemic I was completely fine, I lived my life like a normal teenager and took every opportunity I got to hang out with my friends. I constantly went out to get away from home and ate whatever whenever and never complained once. In this period of my life, I was completely oblivious to the changes that were soon going to occur and how detrimental they were going to be to my life.

When covid first started I wasn’t really alarmed at first because I assumed this would be over in 2 weeks, but the more I stayed home and did everything electronically I realized this was going to be for a while.

 When my junior year came up, we were given the opportunity to attend school physically again but I refused to go back because it was always my dream to do online school due to my many issues with the in-school environment but, with that came a horrible state of mind. I made repeated meals and got bored very quickly with what was around me and lost a lot of weight in that one-year period, until my senior year began.

 I was bummed out with having to go back physically since I already forgot about the people, I attended school with. Having to surround myself with people I was so excited to be away from bummed me out and made my head hurt. The only good thing that came from coming back was the cooked lunches since that was basically the only time, I’d eat but now graduated I see how much I really miss fucking up a dry chicken sandwich.

Starting college made me realize that I must do things on my own and can’t really rely on anyone no matter what. I made myself one meal a day again and started spiraling down a horrible depression but was still functioning through it somehow. With time and becoming conscious again I started working on myself and tried doing little things to start bettering myself again.