In part 1 we established what trust is and why it is important. In part 2 we explore how one can build it.

Rules for building trust

Now we are really getting to the good stuff! Ever since I came across this equation for diagnosing and repairing trust I've been curious about how to practically go about building trust. This is useful for all people, but it's especially useful for leaders. When things feel hard it's hard to diagnose the root cause; in my experience a lack of trust between individuals and/or teams is often at least part of the problem.

Whilst Brene Brown lists a considered 7 Elements of Trust, Covey toys with superstition highlighting "13 behaviours" that build trust. This inevitably leads to unnecessary overlap between the concepts.

Here are 4 rules that cover Covey's points.

Rule #1: Be Authentic

In part 1 we talked about how two of the building blocks of trust were your intentions and motivations. People should come away from conversations with you with the right impression of your intentions and motivations. When you spin a story or only tell a half truth people may read this as being inauthentic.

This is not as easy as "just tell everyone everything". There is a skill in being able to come across as authentic whilst still only sharing what is prudent to. Diplomats are masters at this. For leaders, it is important to develop the skill of having difficult conversations.

Rule #2: Treat People Well

Covey believes that this takes consideration for others and humility. He suggests active listening as a core way of showing consideration.

This is also a three-word summary of one of my favourite books ever.

Rule #3: Meet expectations

This combines competency with clear communication.

In a challenging environment, there needs to be some grace with not achieving results. What is unacceptable, however, is not being forthright about this. Failure is one of the best ways to learn but your ability to do so is dependent on your attitude.

So be clear about what you are hoping to achieve and when. Then if things are off plan, be clear about why you're behind and what you are going to do about it.

A part of this is about setting boundaries. If you are unable to do something, just say so!

Rule #4: Be Trusting

Covey argues that when people are trusted, they almost always rise to the occasion. I think the caveat is that individuals also need to have been successful with the other 3 rules for this to be true.

People have a natural inclination to trust and an innate desire to be trusted. Conversely, when people aren't trusted, they tend to underperform.

The more responsibility people feel for something, the more ownership they will take. The more ownership they take, the more effort they will put into that thing.

Just as creating lasting peace requires at least one peacemaker to put differences aside, trust requires at least one person to be vulnerable and trust first. In an organisation or team, that needs to be the leader.