We heal in community, we can not heal in isolation

I have lived in and worked in communities where there has been a higher incidence of adversity from childhood all the way to old age compared to others. It takes its toll, the suffering is intergenerational.

Funerals

I have a very vivid memory of walking home after the funeral of a young person who passed away unexpectedly and tragically. You know the story, usually we find ourselves after a funeral walking with others in that sombre state of silence as you reflect on your connection to the person alongside those waves of sympathy for the family. We got to a point where we would part and walk our separate ways and one of the guys said,

"see you at the next one".

It hit me HARD! I couldn't get it out of my head (and we all know how much I live inside my head!). I did a quick calculation of the number of deaths, variety of means by which people passed away and as I tried to process that, my mind was also flagging the other factors that cause trauma like poverty, neglect, abuse, prison, addiction, violence....... this small community (that I grew up in) was holding such a volume of trauma in the story of its existence that it was almost too overwhelming to process. What can we do?!

Post Traumatic Wisdom

We must recognise and support the work that nurtures solidarity, understanding and hope. Youth Work, Community Development, Social Care.

Post Traumatic Wisdom comes out of this work. It is not something that is taught in a training, it's not an intellectual concept that you can learn from someone else or a book. It is acquired when we come together and sit with the stories of our experiences and recognise how we have suffered, how we have coped and how we can better face the challenges in our communities together. It is not about forgetting or blocking out the pain, its about exploring, learning, sharing, taking the time required to hold space for the trauma and for each other. The wisdom that emerges from this work serves the next generation and the hope is that we don't accept the normalisation of a statement like "see you at the next one".