This is a lesson that took me almost 20 years to figure out.

Because a fixed mindset sees talents and abilities as fixed and not learnable, they become risk averse so they can't be exposed as "not good enough".

The truly devious part is when you're so good at letting the risk aversion run subconsciously, you still believe the story that you're growth-oriented.

Highschool: The No-Pain, No-Growth Zone

I had insecurities (and acne) like any high schooler, but life was pretty sweet.

I made the teams, I got the grades, and I had great friends. Failure wasn't in my dictionary. Which made it a perfect place for a fixed mindset to be born...out of "evidence" that being great comes easily.

College: Following Passion or Avoiding "Exposure"?

College was a wonderland and I had a blast. But, for the first time in my life, I started making some choices to avoid things that seemed risky to my ego.

Having to work for success felt foreign and I retreated to opportunities that complimented my known strengths. The fixed mindset grew more powerful.

Career: The Fairytale Can't Survive The Real World.

Because real life constantly demands you do things that aren't in your wheelhouse, it drives a fixed mindset to live what I call The Coward's Dream:

The Coward's Dream: Hoping to be seen as gifted while only giving a half effort because you're greatest fear is to try your hardest and not be enough.

The fixed mindset had taken over. I sunk into a lifestyle designed to preserve the image that I was effortlessly talented. I let myself down time and time again until I hit rock bottom. Which is ultimately what it took to start over. But that's a story for another day...