The teen years mark a transition point between childhood and adulthood, introducing more freedom, and, many teens are quick to point out, more responsibilities. My peers and I sometimes complain about the lack of freedom we have, compared to the number of responsibilities we have. While parents may believe that their teen just wants "more freedom", the reality is that we just want more choice.

Choice gives us control over our lives

The ability to choose is empowering and motivating. Choice enables us to have control in our lives - being told what to eat, what to wear and what classes to take is like being a robot instead of an individual. As teens, control becomes incredibly important in order to express our individuality and experiment with our interests.

Choice allows us to learn about ourselves

The act of choice often leads to success or failure consequences, which help teens learn about making wise decisions, for instance, when choosing when to do homework. It also helps us learn about our interests, by trying out different kinds of art, sports, or other activities and deciding on a favorite.

Choice is freedom - and teens want it

The ability to choose is freeing, however, parents know that we can't decide everything about our lives. Instead of leaving all decisions up to your teen, try the Two Choice Method. If you want your teen to do their chores, ask: "I need you to do your chores, would you like to sweep or vacuum first?" This also works if you have to say no to your teen - add another option. "You can't go to a sleepover tonight, but we can watch a movie together tonight."

By providing choice to your teens, you're enabling them to express their individuality and learn about themselves - which we're very grateful for.