A couple of months ago I was going through some photos when I saw one of my daughter laughing that was particularly adorable.

Looking closer, the picture seemed dated. Everything about it, from the quality of the photo to the clothes she wore, appeared old. I wondered why my phone camera was so bad that day.

Then it hit me.

I wasn't looking at my daughter. The photo was of my wife when she was our daughter's age.

Seeing my little girl grow up is like watching my wife grow up.

My in-laws used to get out the old tape recorder and watch family videos on Sunday nights. It was fun to see my siblings-in-law interacting together and especially to get an idea of what my wife was like at that age.

I now realize that the voice, appearance, and personality of my wife in those videos are just about the same as our adorable little 5-year-old now.

A while back we watched as our daughter came down the stairs in the morning with one of her stuffed animals behind her back and exclaimed:

"Today's animaaaaaal is... Snowy [the owl]!"

She's done this almost every day since and it's the perfect example of how much of a joy she and my wife both are. Each of them lights up the room anytime they walk in.

If you were to come to our house and ask our girl what she did that day she'd say "great things and fun things!"

She's (almost) always smiling and bouncing around the room, much like I saw her mother do in those home videos we used to watch.

And although my wife doesn't bounce around like a toddler anymore, she's still got the same energy and enthusiasm for life and adventure that I fell in love with over a decade ago.

It's comforting knowing that she and the rest of our kids can turn out as wonderful as their mother. But realizing this also revealed something else.

Maybe the reason I can be so hard on my sons at times is that raising my boys is like watching myself grow up.

And learning to love them and show them grace when they mess up is the key to loving myself when I do the same. Especially when I struggle to be the kind of Dad that I've always wanted to be.

Parenting is the most rewarding and challenging thing in the world. Possibly the most difficult part is the times you wish you'd have been better to your kids.

And yet, if they can love me even after I've made mistakes, maybe I can too.

Even better, if I can see so much good in my daughter and wife, maybe I can do the same for my boys and me. Maybe our shared love for adventure, video games, and learning can be something I can love myself for also.

I've got a long way to go to be the kind of Dad that I want to be. But realizing that having kids is like watching my wife and I grow up gives me a lot of hope that I can.