As a kid, whenever I did something that hurt someone, my parents always told me to "treat others as I wanted to be treated," or "The Golden Rule."

The Golden Rule

We've been raised to see the Golden Rule as the Gold Standard of human interaction.

These parables of our upbringing continue to pull strongly on our everyday actions, with many people instinctively treating in ways they want to see. Software product managers, especially those coming to the role from another discipline as a "Subject Matter Expert," or "SME," are particularly prone to believing they already know what's best for others. Many spend months or years on the "perfect" startup, only to release it to silence.

To get out of this "Ivory Tower" belief that we know what's best for others, we need a better rule.

Enter the Platinum Rule

Coined by @davekerpen, the Platinum Rule takes the Golden Rule, and subtly shifts it to massively increase it's power -

Instead of treating others as we wish to be treated, treat them as they wish to be treated.

Rather than us inflicting our likes, dislikes, and preferences on others, the Platinum Rule differs by inviting us to consider the needs of others first.

Empathy at the core

The core shift is based on empathy - actively seeking to understand first.

Empathy involves actively putting yourself in the shoes of the other person, and experiencing the world through their eyes. Instead of inflicting what we believe others should like, we open up to a deeper understanding.

Better product outcomes through empathy

The Platinum Rule's empathy focus has a direct impact on product management.

One great approach is to use generative user interviews, a technique that asks users to "tell them about a time..." in an open-ended fashion. Applied skillfully, product managers can start to truly understand their customer's worldview, and gain an appreciation of their users' unique needs, pain points, & desires. Working backwards from these needs to actual product outcomes is the primary empathetic focus that de-risks better solutions.

Plan to understand user needs first so you can treat them to the Platinum Rule - as they wish to be heard, understood, and treated.