In a previous article, I spoke about the importance of reframing negative self-talk.

Later an article by @newhireguy on rookie presentation mistakes. The mistakes seemed like examples of negative. Knowing the different types and the behavior that might follow, could help you recognize when you are engaging in negative self-talk.

This group of self-talk has is very ego centered. Everything is about "us", when it should be about the task we are performing.

1: You are not a mind reader.

Assuming that you know what someone is thinking without any evidence is mind reading.

@newhireguy first presentation mistake, starting a presentation with an apology, is perfect example. You are making an assumption and dragging down the presentation all by yourself.

2: You are not a fortune teller.

Assuming that you know how people will act without any evidence is fortune telling.

Often done in conjunction with another type of self-talk, the combination usually amps up your anxiety, followed by assuming the worst-case scenario. "They hated my talk." [mind reading-anxiety] "I'll be stuck doing this project by myself!" [fortune telling] Miffed, you quickly leave the meeting.

3 & 4: No one noticed your mistake, and it definitely is NOT the end of the world.

Magnification is exaggerating simple mistakes or flaws. Catastrophizing is turning the exaggeration into a disaster.

Your boss is not going to fire you [catastrophizing], because you ruined a company document (made a couple of typos on an inner office memo). [magnification]

5: Please learn how to accept a compliment.

Minimization if the opposite of magnification. You diminish all of your skills and strengths.

This type of self-talk leaves you feeling like a second-class citizen. No compliment is taken seriously. In assessments, only the negative marks are focused on. You definitely don't promote yourself. So how will anyone no what you can do?

If you see yourself in any of these examples. Don't beat yourself up. Self-talk is sneaky. Instead recognize what it is and challenge the statement. In time you will whittle these away.

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