I had to learn this the hard way, so that you don't:

Gaslighting isn't just confined to romantic relationships; it has an equally sinister presence in the workplace. And unfortunately, women are more susceptible to being gaslit.

The following toolkit would have spared me months of feeling isolated and disempowered.

1. How to identify workplace gaslighting

You get feedback that makes you question your perception of your reality. You feel uneasy.

You get feedback that is broad and un-specific. While it may include both positive and negative commentary, you leave feeling confused about the overall takeaway message.

When you (attempt to) speak out, you feel powerless.

2. How to overcome it

Find an ally, such as another superior who may be able to vouch for you, by providing them with specific examples of how the gaslighter has treated you and confused you. Be sure to highlight your contributions and impact.

Never be alone with the gaslighter once you know they’re gaslighting you.

And if it's possible, don't work with them again.

3. How to prevent it

Ask for consistent feedback (e.g., at least once a week) so that you are not caught off guard later on. If you find you are not getting the feedback you need, bring up your concerns to the person. If they are not responsive, get HR involved.

Get everything in writing, don’t talk about important things on the phone. When you agree on next steps, always ask to get things re-iterated in writing, so that you are never unarmed.