While owning items can provide satisfaction, the excitement often lies in anticipating new things.

Allow me to explain.

Dr. Sapolsky said:

Dopamine is not about the pursuit of happiness but the happiness of a pursuit.

We often believe that once we get that job, girl, car, phone, and house, we will be happily ever after.

But only a few of us know it is a lie.

There's a psychological phenomenon about this called The Arrival Fallacy.

It is where we thought we would be happy once we arrived at our destinations, but we became more miserable than ever because the happiness was nowhere to be found.

We buy a new iPhone model only to realize it offers nothing significantly better than the previous model.

We own a closet full of clothes only to realize we have nothing to wear.

We buy a new sports car only to realize it is a regular car that gets us from point A to B.

We buy a new house only to realize it looks like a small apartment that we used to live in with the same basic functionalities to cover our heads from the sun's heat and the night's cold.

The excitement of owning something fades away in a blink of an eye.

We realize owning something is not the thing that makes us happy.

But, if we look at a pattern, the joy actually comes from anticipating things coming our way instead of owning them.

I remember how excited I was when waiting for my new iPhone.

I remember how excited I was when I got a new job with a higher salary.

I remember how excited I was when waiting for my vacation in the next few months.

Humans are wired to desire and chase something.

Our ancestors used to seek food from every corner of the world only to realize the food was only sustained for a short time.

It is one of the ways our survival mechanism works.

The thrill of getting new things often overshadows the satisfaction of having them, leading to a continuous cycle of desire and acquisition.

Again, we are trapped in these hedonic treadmills, not knowing that we keep repeating the same pattern all over again.

I keep on questioning myself every day? Will there be an end to this?

At what point will I be satisfied with everything I have without wanting to keep chasing new things, hoping it will fix my broken brain of being enough with what I have.

It is a reminder of the importance of finding balance and seeking fulfillment in non-material aspects of life, such as relationships, experiences, and personal growth.

How's your relationship with your desire? Is it under your control, or does it control you?

Having things isn't fun, getting things is fun

The Arrival Fallacy.

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