6 Steps to Ask Better Questions

Want to know the ultimate skill, that helps you in almost every situation as a leader? Really? Are you ready? You might have guessed it already from the headline - Asking questions well. It is not just about what you are asking but also how you are asking it.

Are you having trouble in your 1:1s? Can't really start deeper conversations? Want to really understand the motivation behind something? Well then I would recommend you the 6 steps I am sharing below.

Step 1: One question at a time

Don't overwhelm the other person. Ask one question at a time, to give enough space and time to the answer. If you ask multiple questions at once, you are overflowing the other person and the answer will only be half as good.

Step 2: Ask "What" questions

"Why" and "How" questions generally move the conversation int a defending and solution oriented conversation. "What" questions like "What's on your mind", "What else", "What is the really going on here" display curiosity and interest potentially opening up to a deeper conversation.

Step 3: Use all available channels and media

Don't limit yourself to just in person or video calls to ask questions. Use Slack, Email or even recorded video messages. Coaching or at least asking great questions doesn't just happen face to face.

Step 4: Embrace the silence

This was a hard one for me. Be ok when it is quiet. We all have different ways to digest information. Maybe someone needs a few more seconds to think about an answer. Ask the question and then give them space.

Step 5: Really listen to the answer

I shared an essay about Active Listening already. This is equally important here. Don't just nod with your head while thinking about what to cook for dinner tonight. Be present in the moment and give the conversation your full attention.

Step 6: Acknowledge the answer

This is especially important when working virtually. Letting the other person know that you are engaging is key. It can be as simple as saying "I hear you" or "That sounds tough". You show the other person that you are with them in this moment.