A few years ago, my husband and I were unhappy with just about every big aspect of our lives. We didn't like our tech jobs, the city we lived in, or feel inspired by our day-to-day.

We made a lot of changes that year, and one of them was to move to an island for a few months to scuba dive.

Moving to island is not your typical response to "I don't love the way my life is panning out," but it was such a cool experience that I'll always cherish.

Here are the top 3 things I learned from this experience:

1. Deciding to live in a walkable location is the one decision that simplifies 1,000 other downstream decisions.

We lived in an area that had only one main road but had everything we needed  (groceries, restaurants, coffee shops). Since we didn’t have a car, we ended up walking this road anytime we needed to leave the house, which was sometimes multiple times a day.

Within 4 weeks of living on this small but lively area, if I was walking down the street for a last-minute errand to pick up fruit or more sunscreen, I would run into someone I knew.

We got to know our neighbors, local businesses, and built a community so much faster and easier than we would have in a less walkable area.

2. Constraints are actually an advantage IF you can control your FOMO.

The area we stayed at had two bars within a 15 min walking perimeter. It felt pretty small and limiting initially.

But after a few weeks, we realized that because there were only 2 bars, it was easier to get to know people we kept seeing. It made it easier to walk up to them and say "hey, I've seen you around. What brings you to the island?" And it actually led to real friendships.

Once I got over my FOMO of wanting endless options, I saw that there's a real strength to all these constraints.

3. The US is expensive, and it's not our only option.

While on the island, we met a nomad from Canada who explained that a lot of young people were leaving because it was too expensive. I started wondering if the US was on a similar path.

While I personally don't intend to permanently move outside of the US, it got me thinking about other options. Why had I never considered moving to a different country for a year?

Are there other examples where I'm unconsciously selecting the "default" option put in front of me? Probably.

Picking up and moving to an island for a few months was a radical reminder that I have a lot more agency than I think to design my life.

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