Shoot your shot. Like that time you showed up at a roller derby practice in your twenties without tattoo sleeves or the ability to roller skate, but you called yourself Cinnamon American and made the team—like a freaking badass! Playing it safe is the real risk. You risk losing yourself, never achieving your dreams, and never evolving. shudders “It’s safe to dream big. You’re meant for epic shit.”—Erica Reitman, founder of The Icon Agency.

Be tenacious, like a pit bull. When your ol’ corporate manager called you tenacious like a pit bull, you took offense, but it was a compliment! All those dreams withering away under the seat of your Pontiac next to a half-eaten PB&J are possible if you’re determined. To be tenacious is persisting in existence, and if we’re not in pursuit of life, aren’t we just roadkill? Pee-yew.

College isn’t the only path. You hemmed and hawed over going to cosmetology and culinary school and wondered if a writing degree would give you the validation to be a writer. Did you really want to weed whack bikini lines or stink like soup for eternity? Nope. You wanted to be a writer, though, and it turns out the only piece of paper that makes you a writer is the one you write yourself. Do what interests you and forge a path to enjoyable work; degrees be damned.

Embrace authenticity. When you were ten, a Virginia Slims-smoking dung beetle whispered that you looked like a hooker in your favorite pink halter top. The HR lady farted the idea into your psyche that you were too much (and that your cleavage distracted the accountants). So, honey, you shrunk yourself into a flaccid cactus so your boss would take you seriously. He didn’t. Take up space, be yourself, and wear the red lipstick. You are exactly enough for the career you truly desire.

Know your value. Asking for money can be a filthy, shameful business, but that’s only because you think it is. You are worth the kind of money you want to make, and it’s a disservice to everyone when you lowball yourself into the struggle swamp, where high-interest credit cards thrive, and dreams go to die. It’s hard to be creative when you don’t know how to pay for that mole biopsy your insurance didn’t cover. 

Rejection leads to success. Your elementary school crush, who looked exactly like Harry Potter, snubbed you and shoved you in gym class during “ships across the ocean,” fracturing your arm. An uncomfortable no, but one broken heart lead to eight bazillion other cuttlefish in the swamp. If you shoot your shot doing what you love with tenacity and authenticity and ask for what you deserve only to receive a lukewarm “GET OFF MY LAWN,” that’s a good thing. That opportunity wasn’t epic enough for you, darlin’. You’ll be happier when the yes comes on your terms.

Your unique skills are in demand. Your days as a freelance vibrator saleswoman may be over, but your experience educating women on pleasure, mated with your sales psychology training, and your wicked creative writing skills make you in demand for companies that want to be growers on the internet. You are an enigma, and nobody is exactly like you. Your life experiences, talents, interests, values, and opinions make you unique—and there is a company that wants to pay for your brand of genius.