Hi, my name is Taylor and I’m an alcoholic and an addict. If you can eat it, drink it, or smoke it and it makes you feel good, I want it and I want as much of it as I can get until I can't stop. Substance abuse disorder, the "ism", call it whatever you want.

I should probably be dead.

But Tampa Bay…you saved my life.

Because of the recovery community here, I haven’t felt the need to pick up a drink or a drug since November 10th, 2014.  And today, I get to be more than an alcoholic. I’m also a loving son, partner, friend. I’m a local small business owner. I’m a super average, marathoner, triathlete and golfer.

When I tell people my story, they often say: “Wow! You must have so much a lot of will power.”

I promise you my story isn't about will power. Ask my girlfriend about my relationship with french fries. Instead, I have community. Because the opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety or fitness or health: it is love and connection with other people like me. That’s what saved my life.

We’re here tonight to raise money for that: to help the phoenix build love and connection and community locally that does and will save lives like mine. The money you donate tonight will stay here and hopefully inspire more stories of recovery like mine in our community.

I come from a really loving family. I don’t have any major trauma, I had an idyllic child hood. But something about my brain and my environment conspired to make me obsessive at a young age. I also experienced feelings of otherness, awkwardness, loneliness, and discontent for almost as long as I can remember.

When I found drugs and alcohol at the age of 16, those two ticks of the mind converged. Alcohol promised to relieve that loneliness and became my joy and my purpose.

I spent the next 8 years largely obsessed with drinking and doing drugs.

In 2012, I moved to Tampa from New York City, convinced that New York was the problem. Get out of that crazy city, pay less income tax. Everything would be fine.

My first night here, I found McDittons Irish Pub, and realized New York wasn’t the problem. My first two years here, I worked and I drank, and I increasingly didn’t recognize myself. I hated who I was, who I’d become. I was constantly embarrassed by my behavior, and I felt so alone in my inability to change. And looking back, having heard and learned so much about recovery, it’s so clear to me now how close I was to ruining my life.

I thought about sharing a bunch of dumb drunk stories, but frankly, my drunk stories aren’t that interesting. I was a sad excuse for a young man, ashamed of who I was, unable to live life on life’s terms. I started to understand that maybe the booze was the root of my problems, and I looked around, and was blessed to see people living here who didn’t drink. A coworker dragged me into the recovery community in Tampa Bay.

Immediately, people of all shapes, sizes, colors, occupations, and backgrounds embraced me as one of their own. They slowly taught me how to live sober. At the time, I didn’t think you could do anything fun without booze. Connecting with other people in recovery further along in their journey showed me that I could do anything in recovery. Community gave me a purpose. I was one of the young guys in early recovery who had a car, so I’d give other young guys in early sobriety rides. I met my best friend because we have a share love of the 90’s boy band Hansen’s song “MMMMBop”. We’d blast it and joy ride on Friday nights after work. We still blast it frequently, 8 years later.

I found joy and life again.

And that’s really what we're here to do tonight with this fundraiser for the phoenix. We can welcome anyone that's curious about sobriety in, and we show them they can go to a concert or a crossfit class without a drink, they can blast mmmbop and be silly, and they can connect with other people like them, and find meaning, purpose, joy, and life again.

A few years into sobriety, I left Tampa and spent three years traveling and exploring recovery communities around the world. During that time, I connected with a sober fitness community, like what we’re building here with the Phoenix, and I went from a Pack a day smoker to a marathoner. Community once again, saved my life.

And while my travels were incredibly exciting, I found that what we have here in Tampa Bay is really special. So I eventually came back, and I started a growing dog day-care business with the MmmmBop guy, Paws ‘n’ Rec, bring us your dogs. We’ll play them some Hansen. I’m so proud to be living and building and supporting others in recovery here through the work we’re doing with the phoenix. And I dont feel Lonely or discontent ever anymore.

Enough about me. Back to you Tampa Bay…

Everyone here tonight looks awesome.

Now about half of you here have a cocktail in your hand, and God bless you for that. Seriously, those in recovery out there love that you can drink responsibly.

The other half, those of you sipping on water, we know each others stories.

At one point, we couldn't stop drinking, we couldn't stop doing heroin, or smoking meth. We tried on our own. It didn't work.

Most of us should be dead and we know this because so many of our friends are dead.

Those of us who survive, who rise, recover, and live don't do so in isolation - we do it by connecting with one another and finding joy, meaning, and purpose together.

The Phoneix is designed to make those connections more accessible to anyone struggling from substance abuse. Our goal this year is to raise $1M. With that money, we’ll be able help some 4,000 people to find new path ways toward recovery. Together we can show anyone struggling with substance abuse that sobriety delivers everything drugs and alcohol once promised that 16 year old lonely kid.

Your contributions tonight all stay here locally and will go towards building that, so bid high and bid often to support our efforts and strengthen our community and save more lives like mine.

With that, I’d like to propose a toast! Raise your glasses.

People often joke that raising a glass of water is bad luck. What you may not understand is how much community, how much work, and how much good luck it took for many of us to be able to raise this water tonight. The only reason my life is the way it is is because of Tampa Bay, so cheers to you.