Every one of us is afraid of something. But those with rewarding lives know how to face their fear and use it to their advantage. Unfortunately, many allow fear to dictate our lives, robbing us of true joy and excitement.

Fear is a natural human emotion

Fear serves many positive purposes in our lives. But irrational fears envelop and lead us to make decisions based on fear, not facts. Here are two fears that, for decades, kept me from following my dreams and living an extraordinary life.

• Fear of failure

• Fear of the unknown

I will show you how I manipulate these fears to drive my desires.

Step 1: Fear of the unknown: Fear sees only the worst-case scenario.

1. Identify what your fear is and write it down. Is it real and has damaging effects, or is it imagined with no basis in reality?

2. Make a list of all the positive outcomes of making a choice.

3. Which one gives you the best opportunity for growth and fulfillment?

I didn't go to college because I was afraid of the unknown. I failed to see how the experience would help me grow. This is a decision I regret to this day.

Step 2: Fear of failure: Society tells us that to fail at something is to be a loser, Keeping us from trying new things and challenging us to take risks. Mistakes are a part of life and teach us what works and doesn't and how we can improve.

1. Identify who/what you are failing: yourself or someone else. Is the world going to fall apart?

2. What can happen if you succeed?

3. What can I learn from the experience?

My fear of not being good enough kept me from becoming a writer for 40 years. When I began writing in public, I started growing as a writer.

Channeling fear: Fear is vital in keeping us safe and can cause more harm than good. Learning how to manage fear allows you to control your life choices.